My return to Blogger... at least for this post.

I haven't been on Blogger in over two years. A lot has happened, but I don't even have the time to update all that. However, I do want to put down some thoughts on my upcoming birthday. I feel like I really need to get this out.

In the next coming days, I will be embarking on my 28th birthday. This marks a very interesting point in my lifespan. It will officially be ten years since I entered “adulthood.” And really, the last ten years have been quite a ride. However, I think my expectation after I turned 18 was that by the time I reached 28, things would be much easier to figure out. It isn’t that I thought everything would just be easy, but I did think that with age and a little wisdom and maturity, figuring it all out – this life thing – wouldn’t be as much of a struggle. However, as I write this I am confronted with the reality that even with the lessons you learn with age and wisdom, life just isn’t that simple.

As I reminisce, I can very confidently say that my childhood was not very easy at all. There were plenty of struggles to deal with, but I was fortunate that it was never as bad as it could have been, or bad as it was for many of my peers in my neighborhood. It all turned out okay, so I felt like it would just keep getting better with every passing experience and lesson. And frankly, each year has brought some new excitement or achievement that has made me very grateful. At the same time, not everything has been berries and roses.

Life is usually filled with ups and downs, obstacles and triumphs. But sometimes I feel like I’m behind the cuff on trying to keep the balance. It’s all like a cruel situation-comedy with me as the confused butt of the joke. It seems more than a rough patch; it’s a whole rough forest. Weird as it feels, I’m sure there will be better days and clearer answers. But right now, a brother is struggling.

Additionally, it seems that every friendship I have is going through some sort of test; whether it is about lack of free time, not being able to return phone calls or just a matter of growing apart. It’s kind of painful to witness friendships that I value slowly weakening, at a time where I could use good friendships the most. I realize that sometimes these things happen and it is a part of getting older, but I think that part of my concern is that I didn’t take enough time to try to preserve these friendships before they reached their declines. I’m not sure of how I would or could do it, but I may have to figure out ways to make amends to save the friendships that can be saved, and strengthen the friendships that are barely stable.

As for love, who knows! The word “complicated” is overused, but it is so perfect for my love life. I don’t really worry about it too much; being a bachelor can be a good thing at my age, but it has been a rollercoaster lately and now the ride is over… the amusement park is closed for the season, and I’m out here hoping for a carnival to just pop out of nowhere. (Sigh)

Even with all of the issues that are clearly clouding my skies, I’m hopeful that this next year will be better than this past year. I know I have work to do, but there is still a lot of living that I am looking forward to, even through the "rough forests."